I forgot how ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS this was. Wish I had remembered to post this on 4/20. Enjoy. It’s NUTS!!

My thoughts lately have been running at a premium, despite the existing wellspring of information and content and thought-starters and blurbs and blogs and vlogs and smogs and frogs and logs…you get it. There’s so much out there. My brain can only remain so plastic. My dad has always taught me to bite off and chew the latest and greatest that the world has to offer, but I often daydream of the possibility that I might, once and for all, let my brain set in place. I imagine just x-ing out of this digital madness that I find myself drowning in.

I can see it now, some archaeologist goes digging for my brain in the near future, no doubt from the new ipad app that allows her to go scouring for early millennial brain bits from the comfort of her own couch. She (I’m imagining a female Indiana Jones…no this isn’t a porno daydream, it’s my neo-feminist aspiration talking) examines my brain bits through her touch screen and notices that I spent the day trying to make my company the industry’s leader in social media, and once I was done with that I went to a workshop to try and learn how others are doing the same. After that, we all talked about it at length and exchanged business cards with the presupposed intention of pairing up over breakfasts and lunches and happy hours to dig, yay deeper into the lonely abyss, together. I then got home, checked into my sofa on Foursquare, re-watched an episode of Mad Men and waited for a text. She would then see that maybe it all just got to be a bit much and that’s why I stole a car, drove to New Mexico and just let it all dry up while sleeping among the coyotes under the stars. 

My point is this. I MEANT TO WRITE AN ENTIRE BLOG POST ABOUT HOW AWESOME THIS WORKSHOP WAS THAT I WENT TO TONIGHT AND HOW I’M REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO GOING TO MORE!!!! …but I was thrown completely off track when I googled one of the speakers, Kenny Miller and this came up!

This isn’t the Kenny Miller who used to work at MTV and is now trying to revolutionize the way we interact with our favorite tv shows! This is a Scottish soccer player, and now I know EVERYTHING about him. Someone held me at gunpoint and made me read every last fact, and I’m not unhappy about it. Granted, he’s not my type (at least he wasn’t 20 minutes ago),  but he certainly had no problem taking ALL of my leftover Don Draper lust and turning it into 20 minutes of counterproductive bliss. 

My conclusion is this, maybe my thoughts are at a premium lately, because I can’t seem to hack my way out of the forest of hashtags that has become my prison. (Hashtags is not recognized as a real word in this spellcheck thingy? WTF!)

That said, I will try to raise my sails high enough to make it past the breakers and onto the sea of ideas I knew before my thought patterns were reduced to pre-determined algorithms, and maybe one day I’ll get to write the piece I wanted about Kenny Miller of Starling.tv.

My only hope is that he googled Ruby Rivers tonight and got distracted by this.

Pam Miller, the American Quilter’s Society Teacher of the Year, sponsored by Ruby River Steakhouse in Idaho Falls, ID. I’m not sure if she’s related to Kenny Miller, but if she were, I’d surely be on the first train to the middle of nowhere. Click here to learn more about Pam’s book, “Quilting Inside the Lines.”

Good night, and wish me luck in dreamland. 

Me singing a song.

Hello. This is me. In my apartment. Playing music.